Are "Thank-You" Notes Out of Style?

This post is about gratitude.  Study after study has shown that people are happier when they are grateful. Sometimes it is suggested that you make a gratitude journal to remind yourself of the good things in your life.  But, what if you not only reminded yourself of all you have to be thankful for, but you actually practiced showing your gratitude by writing thank-you notes?  That would not only make you feel happier, but it would make someone else happier, too.

This post is as much to remind me of the importance of thanking people as it is for you. Too often I neglect to send a thank-you note within a couple of days of attending a party or an event or after receiving a gift.

What is wrong with me?!

Well, I’m busy. Aren’t you? If I think about it, I’m not too busy for the things in my life that I deem important. As my grandmother used to say, “Don’t tell me about your values. Show me what your values are by your actions.”

I love to be thanked or acknowledged, and I bet you do to. I have a friend who regularly writes thank-you notes. What a delight it is when two days after I’ve thrown a party or had her over for dinner, I find a thank-you note in my mailbox. She has made me realize how valuable those notes of appreciation can be. When I read them I automatically feel happier.

How can you get back in the habit of sitting down and writing those notes?

One practical way is to make sure you have the supplies - some nice note cards, stamps and a pen. Keep your note cards in a drawer in your kitchen or another easily accessible place.  That way while you are waiting for the coffee to perk or the water to boil, you can pull one out and write your note.  You can always go look up an address once your note is written.

What do you write in a thank-you note?

My favorite notes usually mention something personal.

Here is an example of an appropriate note which is definitely a step up from not getting a note, but it's not personal.

Dear Sally,

Thank you so much for the lovely party you gave last evening. Jim and I really enjoyed ourselves.

Sincerely,

Your Name

If you are going to make the effort to write, why not go ahead and make it personal?

Dear Sally,

The party last night was wonderful! Your house looked fantastic and the pink roses and candles you had everywhere certainly added to the warm and festive atmosphere.

I certainly appreciate you introducing me to Janet Jones. We had a delightful conversation and I look forward to visiting with her again.

I always look forward to your invitations as I know the effort you put in to make sure your guests have a delightful time. Thanks for including me.

Warmest regards,

Your Name

If you have a business, think about the impact you could make on your potential clients or customers if someone involved in their first visit would sit down and write a personal thank-you note that very day.

From a dentist, doctor, weight-loss coach or chiropractor:

“I understand how much nerve it took for you to actually come in to talk today. You have been worried for quite some time about your problem, yet you were leery of addressing it. I hope we made you comfortable enough to go on with the next step.”

From a children's store or department store:

“I saw how important your granddaughter must be to you as you were trying to find just the perfect outfit for her today. I’m glad we found something you liked.”

From a veterinarian:

“I see how important your pets are to you and how nerve-wracking it is for you to have to trap those feral cats each year to bring them in for their vaccinations. I love it that someone with your heart for animals has chosen to bring them to our clinic. I do hope you feel that we are kindred spirits.”

Think about the things that people have done for you and restart your gratitude project with thank-you notes.

Leave me a comment and tell me how you're doing.

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© 2007-2012 Melinda Coker

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: “Melinda Coker, health coach and author of the book, Diet and Cancer: Is There a Connection?, teaches men and women around the world how to develop a healthy lifestyle.”

Skin Care

The recent book by Dr. Debra Jaliman, Skin Rules, gives some good information about taking care of your skin.  As a beautiful older woman I want all the help I can get, as you probably do.  Her book is an easy read with lots of specific advice so you may want to get a copy for yourself.

In trying to sort out her advice for myself, I have put together a routine using her suggestions for dry/sensitive skin.

In the morning when you first get up:

1.) Wipe your face with a clean, wet wash cloth or a cotton pad wet with water or with a dab of toner (Clinique Mild Clarifying Lotion).

2.) Smooth on some moisturizer (tinted or plain) with sunscreen (Lancome Bienfait Multi Vital or Aveeno Positively Radiant Daily Moisturizer).

When you get ready to put on your make-up for the day:

1.) Cleanse your face with a gentle cleanser (Neutrogena Extra Gentle Cleanser or Cera Ve Hydrating Cleanser).

2.) After cleansing, smooth on a moisturizer with sunscreen (see #2 above).

3.) Apply an eye cream (see #4 below).

4.) Add your make-up as usual.

In the evening before bed:

1.) Remove make-up by wiping your face with a cotton pad wet with water or a dab of toner.

2.) Wash your face with the gentle cleanser and pat dry. (If too tired to cleanse, at least wipe your face with an Olay Cleansing Pad or an Aveeno Cleansing Pad.

3.) On your dry face, apply a retinol product such as RoC Retinol Deep Wrinkle Cream Serum or L'Oreal Advanced Revitalift Face Cream or Peter Thomas Roth Unwrinkle Night Cream  or Skin Medica TNS Essential Serum. 

4.) Apply an eye cream such as Skin Medica TNS Eye Repair or Peter Thomas Roth Anti-Aging Cellular Eye Cream or L'Oreal ReVitaLift Eye Cream or RoC Eye Cream.

I hope you enjoy this concise beauty regimen.  Leave a comment and let me know how you're doing with it.

To purchase the book, you can click on the link below.

A Letter to Paula Deen

Dear Paula Deen,

You make a perfect “beautiful older woman.” You are gorgeous, friendly, ambitious and a “star.” But everything is not perfect. According to news sources, you were diagnosed with type-2 diabetes nearly three years ago. That had to be a horrible day for you. You’ve said you needed those three years to process that diagnosis and to decide how you could help others. Unfortunately, I think you got some bad advice when you decided to help others by becoming the spokesperson for Novo Nordisk, maker of the diabetes drug, Victoza.

You may not even realize it, but diabetes drugs do not cure diabetes. The most important way to cure diabetes is to lose weight. Of course, you can choose to lose weight with bariatric surgery, but that sounds quite drastic to me. It is really not that hard to change your diet. Well… it does take thinking about food in a different way and finding new recipes, but that seems like it would be “right up your alley.”

Multiple studies through the years have shown the benefits of a high-carbohydrate, low-fat diet in the treatment and cure of type-2 diabetes. This starch-based diet means eating meals based around potatoes, rice, corn, sweet potatoes, pasta and beans and then adding some vegetables and fruit.

Too many people tell me that they could never give up meat or cheese or butter or ice cream, but giving up those foods seems like such a small compromise to make compared to being diagnosed with type-2 diabetes and the complications of heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, blindness, kidney disease, gum disease and even amputation of lower limbs that come with it.

Paula, I’m going to give you a recipe to get you started. It looks like it could be yours as it has pastry shells, a filling and some sauce. Yet it is a low-fat, starch-based recipe. And, it’s delicious!

Stuffed Fillo Shells

Ingredients

½ teaspoon olive oil
1 clove garlic, minced
1 cup button mushrooms
½ cup walnuts
1 cup cooked brown rice
½ cup garbanzo beans, rinsed and drained
½ cup oat bran
¼ teaspoon sage
¼ teaspoon marjoram
¼ teaspoon thyme
¼ teaspoon onion powder
1 tablespoon low sodium soy sauce
½ tablespoon Dijon mustard
½ tablespoon natural peanut butter
1 box of 15 frozen mini fillo shells

Directions

Cook rice per package instructions.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Saute’ garlic and mushrooms in olive oil over low heat in a nonstick skillet about 3 minutes.
Process walnuts, brown rice, garbanzo beans and cooked mushroom mixture in food processor.
Put processed mixture in large nonstick skillet and add oat bran, sage, marjoram, thyme, onion powder, soy sauce, mustard and peanut butter. Stir and heat through.
Get the fillo shells out of the freezer and fill them with rice mixture using your hands or a spoon.

Bake 10-15 minutes.

While they are baking, make a Sweet and Sour Sauce.

Ingredients

½ cup pineapple juice
1 tablespoon cornstarch
1 tablespoon catsup
1 tablespoon sugar
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
½ tablespoon low sodium soy sauce
¼ teaspoon mustard powder
¼ teaspoon ginger

Directions

Whisk pineapple juice and cornstarch together before pouring mixture into a saucepan. Add catsup, sugar, vinegar, soy sauce, mustard and ginger and cook over low heat.
Heat and stir until mixture thickens.
Serve as a topping for the stuffed fillo shells.

Serves 4.

Add a green salad and you have a lovely meal.  Let me know how you like the recipe and best of luck to you.

Sincerely,
Coco

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© 2007-2012 Melinda Coker

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: “Melinda Coker, health coach and author of the book, Diet and Cancer: Is There a Connection?, teaches men and women around the world how to develop a healthy lifestyle.”

Jewelry Storage

If you are like most “beautiful women,” you probably have piles of jewelry scattered everywhere.  Some may be in your safe deposit box or your home safe.  Other items might be in various jewelry boxes in your bedroom or bath area.

I have had the hardest time trying to figure out how to store my costume jewelry.  I've purchased jewelry boxes and jewelry "trees."  I have tried using black velvet or organza drawstring bags.  I've tried leaving them in the jewelry boxes they came in.  I've even hung them on nails I've hammered around my closet.  But I never found the perfect solution... until recently.

I bought a few boxes of Ziploc heavy duty pint-sized freezer bags and started sorting my jewelry.  Each necklace got it's own bag.  If it had matching earrings, they went in the same bag as the necklace.  I put 2-3 pairs of earrings in a bag and 2-3 rings in another bag.  This is a great project to do during these cold wintery days when you don't really want to get out and about.  And, you'll feel great when your jewelry is organized and easy-to-find for the New Year! 

When you begin to sort your jewelry, you will find pieces that you had forgotten about.  You'll find those broken pieces and those that you don't want to wear any more.  Just keep the jewelry that you will wear.  Toss out the things you don't want to wear (or sell them).  Take any damaged items that you want to keep for repair.

Once you've got your jewelry all bagged up, you'll need to decide how to store those bags.  You may have some drawers in your dresser that you can use.  You may want to store the necklaces separately from the rings, bracelets or earrings.  If you don't have any drawer space, look at purchasing some baskets, or clear plastic containers or even a beautiful chest such as those pictured below.

Happy Holidays and Happy Jewelry Sorting!

Stella & Dot

According to their web site, Stella and Dot, an Inc. 500 Fastest-Growing Company, is a San Francisco based social selling company that creates flexible entrepreneurial opportunities for women. Their boutique-style jewelry and accessories line is available exclusively through in-home Trunk Shows by Independent Stylists and online. Their one-of-a-kind collections are designed by celebrated New York designers and featured in Gossip Girl, In Style and Lucky Magazine as well as on the wrists and necklines of today's hottest celebrities.

Why am I talking about this company?

Our connection was born at a women's conference in Dallas that my daughter and I attended.  It was there that we met Tysh, a successful Stella and Dot stylist.  She was fun and delightful and told us she would be near Tyler for Thanksgiving and would love to do a trunk show for us.  I thought it could be a fun way to entertain all of the relatives who were at my house, as well as those visiting my friends.  You know how you get tired of eating and fighting the crowds of Black Friday?  Well, join us and slow down for a while, visit friends, look at jewelry and shop for those gifts you still have to buy.

We all loved trying on the wonderful necklaces, bracelets and rings, looking in the mirror or just getting opinions from everyone else. 

We had a nice crowd and there was lots of laughter and excitement.  And, of course, my 8-year-old granddaughter thought it was truly magical!

Have you ever attended a Stella and Dot trunk show?  What did you think?  Post a comment and let me know.



How Often Are You Stretching?

When I went in to the chiropractor this week for my chronic back pain, the first thing she asked, as I was face down on the table, was “How often are you stretching?” Oops. That seems to be one more thing that has been squeezed out of my life. Oh, I do an hour of yoga every couple of weeks, but obviously that is not keeping me anywhere near flexible.

Later in the week, I went to visit my massage therapist. The first thing he asked, as I was face down on the table waiting for his myofascial release massage to begin, was “How often are you stretching?” Oh, no… that same question again.

It seems that as we age, our connective muscle tissue shortens and if we do not stretch our muscles, we become stiff, sore and inflexible. As I’ve been researching, it seems that we need to be stretching every single day, not just a couple of times a month.

Yesterday as I was stretching to my yoga tape, I realized how stiff I was.  A few years ago I could do most of those routines without much trouble at all, but now they were "suddenly" hard to do.  Guess I need to figure out how to get "stretching" squeezed back into my life on a daily basis. Any ideas?

Can We Save Our Husbands?

This is an "all-American breakfast" that we love, but it can kill us.  We've got to start thinking about our health and that certainly doesn't just mean we have to start running or going to the gym.  It means that we need to change the way we eat.
 
I'm on a crusade to "save our husbands."  In the past year I have personally known four men who have suddenly died.  No warning... they just keeled over and died.  What a heartbreaking scenario for their wives and their children as well as their friends.  Is there a way that we can "up the odds" of keeping our husbands alive and well?
 
I think there is.
 
Too often, the first symptom of heart disease is a fatal heart attack.  Of course, this can happen to women as well as men, so I want us to use our "bully pulpit" as the caretakers of our families to make sure we all remain free of heart disease.

There is a preponderance of evidence that a simple change of diet can actually prevent and even REVERSE heart disease.  A recent CNN documentary by Dr. Sanjay Gupta, The Last Heart Attack, showed how we can accomplish that goal.

The first step towards health would be to exchange the breakfast pictured above to one of oatmeal or shredded wheat with a nondairy milk.  Then start eating starches (beans, rice, corn, or potatoes) without added fat or butter, as your main dish for each meal.  Add fruits and vegetables and you are suddenly eating for health and not for heart disease.

Let me know how you do!

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© 2007-2015 Melinda Coker

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: “Melinda Coker, health coach and author of the book, Diet and Cancer: Is There a Connection?, teaches men and women around the world how to develop a healthy lifestyle.”