Are "Thank-You" Notes Out of Style?

This post is about gratitude.  Study after study has shown that people are happier when they are grateful. Sometimes it is suggested that you make a gratitude journal to remind yourself of the good things in your life.  But, what if you not only reminded yourself of all you have to be thankful for, but you actually practiced showing your gratitude by writing thank-you notes?  That would not only make you feel happier, but it would make someone else happier, too.

This post is as much to remind me of the importance of thanking people as it is for you. Too often I neglect to send a thank-you note within a couple of days of attending a party or an event or after receiving a gift.

What is wrong with me?!

Well, I’m busy. Aren’t you? If I think about it, I’m not too busy for the things in my life that I deem important. As my grandmother used to say, “Don’t tell me about your values. Show me what your values are by your actions.”

I love to be thanked or acknowledged, and I bet you do to. I have a friend who regularly writes thank-you notes. What a delight it is when two days after I’ve thrown a party or had her over for dinner, I find a thank-you note in my mailbox. She has made me realize how valuable those notes of appreciation can be. When I read them I automatically feel happier.

How can you get back in the habit of sitting down and writing those notes?

One practical way is to make sure you have the supplies - some nice note cards, stamps and a pen. Keep your note cards in a drawer in your kitchen or another easily accessible place.  That way while you are waiting for the coffee to perk or the water to boil, you can pull one out and write your note.  You can always go look up an address once your note is written.

What do you write in a thank-you note?

My favorite notes usually mention something personal.

Here is an example of an appropriate note which is definitely a step up from not getting a note, but it's not personal.

Dear Sally,

Thank you so much for the lovely party you gave last evening. Jim and I really enjoyed ourselves.

Sincerely,

Your Name

If you are going to make the effort to write, why not go ahead and make it personal?

Dear Sally,

The party last night was wonderful! Your house looked fantastic and the pink roses and candles you had everywhere certainly added to the warm and festive atmosphere.

I certainly appreciate you introducing me to Janet Jones. We had a delightful conversation and I look forward to visiting with her again.

I always look forward to your invitations as I know the effort you put in to make sure your guests have a delightful time. Thanks for including me.

Warmest regards,

Your Name

If you have a business, think about the impact you could make on your potential clients or customers if someone involved in their first visit would sit down and write a personal thank-you note that very day.

From a dentist, doctor, weight-loss coach or chiropractor:

“I understand how much nerve it took for you to actually come in to talk today. You have been worried for quite some time about your problem, yet you were leery of addressing it. I hope we made you comfortable enough to go on with the next step.”

From a children's store or department store:

“I saw how important your granddaughter must be to you as you were trying to find just the perfect outfit for her today. I’m glad we found something you liked.”

From a veterinarian:

“I see how important your pets are to you and how nerve-wracking it is for you to have to trap those feral cats each year to bring them in for their vaccinations. I love it that someone with your heart for animals has chosen to bring them to our clinic. I do hope you feel that we are kindred spirits.”

Think about the things that people have done for you and restart your gratitude project with thank-you notes.

Leave me a comment and tell me how you're doing.

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© 2007-2012 Melinda Coker

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